Black Tangled Heart Read online

  He slipped his fingers out of me and gently tugged down the hem of the dress. Lips on mine, his erection digging into my stomach, he whispered, “Why? Why is making you come the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen and heard in my life?”

  “I don’t know.” I shook my head, unable to do much of anything at that moment.

  “I do.” He took my chin beneath his fingers with one hand, forcing my head up, my eyes to his. The look in them made me want to melt all over again. “It’s because it’s you. No one does it for me like you do. You have no idea.”

  I laughed, because I absolutely did. And it was amazing to me that Jamie felt the same. “I do. I understand completely.”

  “Yeah?” He kissed my lips, soft, sweet, just a caress. Then he pulled back, his expression stern. “Then you’ll know it’s no laughing matter. You should be worried, Doe.”

  “Why?”

  “Because I feel like I’m coming out of my skin. You’re all I think about. You’re all I want. When I want someone’s opinion on something, you’re the first person I think of. I don’t want to be in class because it means I’m not hanging out with you, talking about important shit and not-so-important shit … I want to be buried deep inside you.”

  He nodded, swallowing hard. “Not just …” He slid his free hand under my dress and cupped me in a possessive gesture. “Not just buried in here.” He lifted his hand from my chin and tapped my temple. “But in here.” Then he moved it to cover my breast where my heart pounded beneath it. “And I want to be so deep in here, you’ll never get me out. Because you’re buried in me.”

  Joy suffused me in such a wave of bliss and relief, tears blurred my vision. “You’re already there, Jamie. You have been for a long time.”

  A tear spilled over and Jamie cursed under his breath, catching it on his thumb as he clasped my face in his big hands. “I’m such a moron.” His voice was harsh. Then he kissed me. He kissed me like I was oxygen. “Forgive me,” he begged between kisses. “Forgive me for being so slow on the uptake.”

  I laughed against his mouth. “You got there in the end. That’s all that matters.”

  We kissed until my lips felt sensitive and swollen, until Jamie was clutching at my thigh and grinding his erection into my stomach.

  “We need to stop.” He pulled back, panting. “Before we go too far.”

  “Maybe I want to go too far.”

  “No.” He shook his head. “Not until you’re eighteen.”

  “You can’t mean that.”

  “I don’t want to rush you. I want this to be right.”

  His jaw set stubbornly. With a groan of frustration, he released me and stepped back toward the door. “You should go out first.” He gestured to his erection tenting his jeans. “I need a minute.”

  Although nervousness filled me, I didn’t want to leave him just yet.

  “I have your gift here.” I held it out to him. “Maybe that’ll give you a chance to … cool off.”

  He flashed me a smile and took the gift in hand. “This was on the pile downstairs. I know, because I’ve been eyeballing it since Lorna took it from you.”

  That thrilled me and made me even more nervous about his reaction.

  “Why is it up here now?”

  “I, uh, when I saw you kissing the blond, I suddenly realized that if you opened this, you’d probably guess what you mean to me and then you’d feel sorry for me.”

  “One, she kissed me, and if you’d stuck around long enough, you would’ve seen me push her off and search the room frantically to see if you’d caught her doing it.”

  I laughed at his teasing, my worries eased. “Okay.”

  “And two”—he stepped into my personal space, eyes hooked on mine—“I would never be sorry or feel sorry about you having feelings for me. The opposite, in fact.”

  “I get that now,” I teased right back.

  With a nod, Jamie’s eyes dropped to the gift. Then, with an exasperating slowness, he opened it. When he pulled out the somewhat tattered copy of I Am Legend, he raised an eyebrow.

  “Open it.”

  When he did, he tensed at the sight of the author’s signature. “Is this a signed first edition?”

  “Yeah.”

  His eyes flew to mine and my breath hitched at the hunger I saw on his face.

  “You like it?” I whispered.

  “It’s the best gift I’ve ever gotten.” He placed the book carefully down on the sink and then shot me a wry look. “And now I’m hard again.”

  My laughter cut off when he suddenly lowered to his knees. “What are you doing?”

  “I want to say thank you.”

  I gasped as he pushed my dress back up to my waist and then curled his fingers around my underwear. “Shouldn’t we get back to the party? People will notice.”

  “Fuck ’em.” He pulled down my underwear, and I stepped out of them. Eyes on mine, he watched as I shivered at the feel of his hands caressing my inner thighs before pushing them apart. I widened my stance, dragging in shallow breaths.

  Jamie’s eyes dipped to the shadow between my thighs. He groaned, and then his mouth was on me, and I forgot about anything else but him.

  There was a moment as I rode his mouth, abandoned myself to pleasure, that I wondered if this was the beginning of something we couldn’t control.

  And should it scare me?

  Probably.

  But Jamie McKenna just felt too damn good, and too damn right, for me to care about anything else.

  6

  JAMIE

  Nineteen years old

  The swipe of Jane’s pencil against the sketch paper was driving me nuts. Who knew posing for a drawing would be so sexy?

  Jane sat on my desk chair, her eyes moving over my body and flicking down to the pad in her hand as she followed the lines of my body with her pencil. There was a smoky heat in her gaze that made me hot all over.

  “Isn’t this objectification?” I teased.

  “It’s art,” she replied, her lips twitching with amusement.

  “I’m not sure I need to be wearing only boxers for you to sketch me.”

  Our eyes met, and the blood that was making my heart pound quickly made its way south. I wanted to tell her to get over on the bed, but we’d only been seeing each other for six weeks, and the no-sex thing was already testing my limits.

  “You’re beautiful,” she whispered, and I could tell she meant it. “The lines of your body are beautiful. I want to see them.”

  She wanted to see all of them.

  It was me who insisted I keep my boxers on. We needed some boundaries; otherwise I’d lose myself in her. Which was exactly what my shy, not-so-shy-with-me, sexy girl wanted.

  “It would be better if you lost the boxers,” Jane said.

  See?

  I grinned at her and shook my head. “What if Lorna came home? It would be pretty hard to explain why I’m letting you draw me naked.”

  “It’ll be pretty hard to explain why you’re letting me draw you half-naked,” she argued.

  For the sake of peace, and so we got to know each other as boyfriend and girlfriend before World War III broke out, we’d kept our relationship a secret from everyone. The truth was, we didn’t want to have to deal with Lorna just yet. However, I didn’t know how much longer I could handle the secret. It had only been a month, and the small moments of time we stole when I didn’t have practice and Lorna had practice after school was quickly becoming not enough.

  “Hmm.” Jane bit on the end of her pencil, her eyes moving between me and the sketch.

  “What is it?”

  “I can’t get your left nipple right.”

  I chuckled. “Nipple problems, huh?”

  She sent me a smile that caused a flutter in my stomach. A fucking flutter. These past few weeks, I’d discovered a new side to Jane. She was quiet, reserved, kind of shy, yes … but not with sex. She was uninhibited with me. Jane just had to look at me, how she looked at me right then, and my dick g
ot hard.

  Not that we’d had sex. I was determined not to until she was eighteen. But we were doing other shit, and Jane was so beyond passionate and exciting, I was losing my mind.

  Holding out for another eight months … well, it might as well have been ten years.

  I watched as she put the sketch pad on my desk and then got up to cross the room to me. My eyes dipped down her body and back up. She was wearing jean shorts and a T-shirt, and it made me as hot as sexy lingerie on her would have.

  “Jane …” Her name came out hoarse. “What are you doing?”

  “I need a closer look.” She placed a knee on the bed and crawled toward me on all fours.

  Fuck.

  Her citrusy scent tickled me as she pressed a hand to my chest and gave it a little push.

  I obliged by rolling onto my back, already hard.

  Then she straddled me, resting her ass right on my erection.

  I hissed in a breath as her eyelids lowered and she gave a little moan.

  “Jane.” I gripped her hips, half wanting to push her off and half needing to grind her on me.

  “Let’s have a look,” she murmured, bending her head toward my nipple. Her thumb rotated over it and I shifted beneath her, my skin flushing. Then she kissed it, tongue flicking against the nub.

  “Fuck.” My fingers bit into her hips and I pushed her down over me.

  Jane’s breathing stuttered as she undulated, rubbing against me.

  “Fuck, fuck.” I grabbed her hips and tried to lift her off, but she wouldn’t budge. I glowered up at her. “You need to get off me.”

  Sighing, she sat up straight and then lifted her T-shirt up over her head and threw it across the room. Any words of discouragement died in my throat as she unclipped her bra and took it off. Her full breasts jiggled as she threw the bra away, her dusky nipples tightening into mouthwatering little buds.

  Fuck, fuck, fuck.

  “I’ll get off you.” She smoothed her hands up my abs and bent toward my mouth. “If that’s what you really want.”

  “You’re a temptress.” I cupped her beautiful face in my hands. “You know that, right?”

  I didn’t give her time to answer. I lifted off my back, crushing her mouth to mine as my hands caressed her breasts, kneading them. My thumbs dragged over her nipples as she rocked against me.

  I broke the kiss and pulled roughly on her hair to arch her back, and she whimpered with excitement.

  I took her right nipple in my mouth and sucked it hard, groaning in satisfaction as she cried out and raked her nails down my back. Everything else ceased to matter. We were just lips and tongues and hands and fingers and skin.

  Heat and sweat enveloped us.

  The tension deep in our guts became more important than rational thinking.

  Soon Jane was naked, her sexy, beautiful body spread out beneath me. My boxers gone, my dick hard and throbbing between her legs.

  I couldn’t think straight.

  I couldn’t think beyond the need to be inside her.

  She was panting, her eyes smoke, her pussy wet against my tip, and I had her right thigh gripped tight against my hip, opening her to me. I nudged, gritting my teeth, already anticipating how tight she’d be but worried about hurting her, wanting it to be good for her.

  “Jamie,” she begged, lifting her hips toward me. “Please.”

  Her face was flushed, her eyes on me, and I felt like the only man in the world. She always made me feel like the only man in the world.

  I pushed into her. “Jane—”

  My head jerked up at the sound of my bedroom door crashing against the wall. Heart pounding, my first instinct was to cover Jane’s body with mine as my little sister barged into the room.

  “Shit!” I grabbed at the duvet we’d cast aside and tried to cover us. “Get the fuck out!” I yelled.

  “I knew it!” Lorna screamed, her face screwed up in outrage and hurt. “I fucking knew it!” Her eyes flew to Jane, who was trying to hide under my body. Feeling her shaking beneath me, her embarrassment and worry made me even more pissed.

  I shielded her as much as I could and addressed my sister. “If you don’t get out right now, I’ll lose my shit like you’ve never seen me lose my shit, Lor.”

  Whatever she heard in my voice made her take a step back. “I’ll be downstairs, waiting for you two assholes to explain yourselves!”

  With that, she stomped out of the room.

  I cursed again and pulled away from Jane, worried I was crushing her. “You okay?”

  She tried to scramble out from underneath me, and the desperate way she attempted to get away caused my panic. I took hold of her biceps to stop her. She wouldn’t look me in the eye. Jesus Christ.

  “Hey.” I forced her chin up, her eyes on me. “We aren’t doing anything wrong.”

  Jane trembled. But she nodded and I calmed a little. “I’m just embarrassed. And not prepared to face her.”

  “This is you and me,” I reminded her. “We’re allowed to date. This is not something she gets to dictate.”

  At her slow nod, I kissed her. Long, deep, and with every ounce of emotion I felt for Jane so she’d know that I’d put up with anyone’s shit, including Lorna’s, as long as I got to keep her.

  After we’d dressed, I held Jane’s hand tight in mine as we made the descent into hell.

  As soon as we stepped off the last stair, Lorna launched off the couch, eyes on Jane as she charged toward us.

  I pushed Jane behind me, and Lorna stumbled to a halt.

  “What did you think I would do?” She blinked, paling, as if I’d hit her.

  “I wasn’t sure.”

  “I’d never hurt Jane.”

  Jane stepped out from behind me. “Lorna, we were going to tell you.”

  “I’d never hurt Jane,” Lorna repeated, glaring at me, before turning to her best friend. “Unlike my brother.”

  Anger churned in my gut. “Lorna.”

  “No. This is ridiculous.” She gestured between the two of us. “You two don’t make sense at all, and Jane is not ruining our friendship over a fling with you, Jamie McKenna.” She crossed her arms over her chest and stared defiantly at Jane. “It’s him or me.”

  Jane’s expression was as shocked as mine. “What?”

  “I said, it’s Jamie or me. If you date him, our friendship is officially over.”

  The color disappeared from Jane’s face.

  That was it. I lost it. “Are you serious?” I yelled. “You can’t make her choose between us. You’re fucking nuts, do you know that?”

  “No.” Lorna’s eyes filled with tears. Crocodile tears. Manipulative brat. “What I know is that no one ever picked me. Until Jane. She’s my best friend and I need her. If you two split up, what happens then, huh? What happens to me and Jane?”

  “We won’t split up.”

  “Oh please, Jamie, you’re a man-whore. As soon as you get bored, you’ll dump her.”

  “You don’t know shit!”

  Jane flinched at my side with the impact of my roar.

  It didn’t even touch Lorna. Not even an earthquake could intimidate her. “I know she’s my best friend and I love her. You don’t!” She turned toward Jane, her eyes beseeching. “I’m the only one in the world who loves you.”

  I remembered overhearing her say something similar to Jane years ago. I should’ve done something about it then. I pushed between Jane and Lorna, and my sister stumbled back. “Do you even hear yourself?” I asked, my voice calm but hoarse with the fury I was trying to check. “Do you hear the sick, manipulative bullshit you’re trying to fill her head with? And how long, huh? How long have you been filling her head with this shit?” I spun away from her to take Jane by the hands, putting her palms on my chest.

  She stared up at me, wide-eyed. “Jamie?”

  “I don’t want you to ever believe her bullshit, okay? She’s only saying it to get you to do what she wants, the same way she has done your entire friendship.”


  A weariness entered Jane’s eyes that I didn’t like. “I know that.”

  I relaxed, slipping my arms around her shoulders as I turned to my sister. She wasn’t getting into Jane’s head with that toxic crap. That’s all I cared about.

  Lorna’s face crumbled. “You’re supposed to be my big brother. It’s my feelings you’re supposed to protect. And you never have. I don’t want you to do this. Why won’t you choose me?”

  I squeezed my eyes closed, hearing the real pain in her voice. The problem was twofold. For reasons I didn’t care to think on too long, our dad hadn’t been kind to my little sister. In fact, he only ever had time for me, but he was at least sweet enough to Skye. Lorna, he treated like shit. I knew this had affected my little sister.

  And then Lorna was just like our mom. Unlike when I was a kid, pandering to my mom, I wouldn’t sacrifice my happiness for someone who would never be happy, no matter the choices I made. “I love you, Lor. You’re my kid sister and I will always love you. But this isn’t about you.”

  “Jane’s my best friend.”

  “Yeah. And you just told her no one would love her like you do. Do you not understand how fucked up that is? That’s shit sociopaths say to people.”

  She glared at me. “That’s not fair.”

  “Yeah? You say you love Jane, but you haven’t asked her how she feels about me, if being with me makes her happy. Because you don’t care. You don’t care about anyone’s happiness but your own. You hand out your love to her in exchange for her obedience.”

  Jane stiffened under my arm, and I gave her a reassuring squeeze.

  “I don’t hand out love in exchange for anything,” I said, swallowing hard, my heart pounding. “I love Jane and …” I turned, looking down at her as she stared up at me in shock. I think it was a good shock, though. “I love you. And it isn’t dependent on you loving me back or doing what I want you to do. I just love you.”

  It wasn’t how I wanted to tell her, but I needed her to know before she let Lorna mess with her head.

  “Talk about manipulative,” Lorna scoffed, completely ruining the moment. “How many girls have you said that to?”